Sharing my adventures, thoughts and occassional jokes. Sorting through laundry, and a little bit of life…This is How I Train My Dragons…

Chicken Mommin’ Aint Easy

on November 25, 2017

Ever since we moved out to the farm, I casually talked to Ray about “someday” having chickens. I’m not sure when or why I decided that chickens needed to be in our life, but I knew my “someday” would come. Who wouldn’t want an animal that poops breakfast?? Kidding…kind of.

Back in May, we had some friends of ours offer us their 3 chickens as well as their homemade coop! I was over the moon excited, or as one might say, pretty clucking stoked. Anyway, the day before I graduated the chicks were dropped off. Since there were 3, obviously each of the kids picked one. Emaleigh picked Nugget, Elijah picked Ash, and Eydan picked Hei-Hei.

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I still giggle because when we put them in their coop I remember my sweet husband asking if we needed to let them out “to go potty”. We are so used to how dogs operate, we still needed to all familiarize ourselves with how chickens work.  The kids and I would sit outside in their little pen for hours watching them and (eventually) holding them. After a few weeks, I decided to make them a shady area in their pen. There was some wood on top of the coop that I used to hold down a corner piece of a tarp that I had tied down on the opposite side of the fence. The kids and I were all in the pen when all of the sudden the wind picked up. Seriously, the next 30 seconds were like in slow motion so I’m going to tell it just like that.

I looked over at the coop and the wind picked up the tarp (remember the wood on top?) Yep, you guessed it. A piece of the wood flew up and before I could even catch it or reach for it (I’ve been told I have the reflexes of an elephant) it landed…on top of Ash’s neck. As quickly as I could, I picked up the wood and she began to hop up and down with a very loose neck. I ran inside to tell Ray, thinking he might have a great idea. Nothing. So, I ran back outside and within 10 seconds she stopped jumping and just died. I looked up at the kids and we all just started bawling. By this time, Ray comes outside and says, “Well, shall I get the crockpot ready?” For those of you that know Ray, you know he likes to joke…but, we weren’t ready for any yolks quite yet. So, Ash got a proper burial and Ray got a kick to the shins. Sad day. Down to 2.

A few weeks later, I came out to see Nugget eating her food and noticed drops of blood around the coop. Lots of feathers, but no Hei-Hei. I wish I knew what happened to her, but maybe it’s best that I don’t. We suspect it was fowl play. Down to 1.

A friend had told me that we should get more chickens because they need friends. So, like any other woman would do, I found a chicken on a group on facebook and met a lady to swap money and a chicken at a gas station. Seriously, I felt like I was part of some underground chicken on the down low type of swap. I literally brought a box (with no lid) to bring her home in. As Eydan and I were leaving for the cluck deal, Ray said, “Really? You’re not taking something with a lid?” Being the professional cluck dealer that I am, I assumed I would be ok. Eydan may or may not have had to put his feet on top of the chicken on our ride home, but we made it, and we welcomed home Patty. Back to 2.

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The previous owner said that Patty laid eggs so I was pretty excited. Her first egg was as big as a little robins egg…but I was still pretty pumped! I was able to make 1/2 cupcake with that egg! Totally kidding (it only made 1/4 cupcake). IMG_8170Well, we had Patty for about a month and at the beginning of the school year, we came home to find Patty sleeping behind the coop. Not a clue what happened to her, but she also got a proper burial. Back down to 1.

Screen Shot 2017-11-25 at 7.44.46 PM.pngNugget. The lone survivor. The kids joked around and said that maybe Nugget was actually the killer of the other birds because she enjoyed being by herself. She’s the bird that would get out of her pen during the day, and then when it got dark, she would put herself to bed. Such a responsible chick. Every time I would go outside, she would follow me around (always chicken me out…get it?)

Just within the last two weeks, she even let me pick her up. She started to get a little nosy and walk up towards the road, so if I was home, I’d pick her up and bring her back by the house…15 seconds later she’d be waddling as fast as she could back by the road. Unfortunately, yesterday she made it all the way to the middle of the road and died. Down to 0.

(I know, I know, -insert “why did the chicken cross the road” jokes here). As crazy as it makes me sound, she was seriously the coolest chick around. She had quite a personality and we were so used to her greeting us outside that it’s now weird to not have her out there. She was my costar in some of the silliest videos I have made…honestly I make myself laugh alot harder than I really should.  A few days before she died, I made the joke that this ugly duckling was the reason that she was going to the road.IMG_8172.jpg

So yeah, my first time at this whole chicken mama thing was kind of rough. I get attached to animals and maybe you just shouldn’t with chickens because you just never know when the wood will drop. (Face palm). But, Nugget made all of the frustration and tears worth it. We enjoyed having her around for the short time that we did. She may have been a free loader who never laid any eggs , but she was a legit mother clucker.

Next spring we will give it a go again… Tender, Molè, and Mary Poopins comin’ in hot.

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